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Transforming Our Lives through Self Reflection and Psychology
A psychology professor's collection of lessons fostering self-discovery through online activities, hands-on classroom experiences, engaging lectures, and effective discussion prompts.
Online Activity by Katie Hope Grobman
How Do We Know When We're Being Ourselves? Eight Facets to the Psychology of Authenticity
Most of us have moments when we feel completely genuine. And other moments when we wonder if we're acting out of habit, expectation, or something else entirely. What does it actually mean to be authentic?
Most of us have moments when we feel completely genuine. And other moments when we wonder if we're acting out of habit, expectation, or something else entirely. What does it actually mean to be authentic? In this activity, you'll answer about 70 questions exploring your thoughts, feelings, values, behaviors, and relationships. Your responses create a personalized profile across four dimensions of dispositional authenticity: self-awareness, living in alignment with your values, seeing yourself honestly (strengths and all), and being open and genuine with others. There are no right or wrong answers. It's simply an opportunity to pause, reflect, and learn a little more about what it means to be yourself.
π°οΈ Estimating Time
π€ΈββοΈ Activity (new tab): 7 to 15 minutes
π After-Activity Reading (below): 7 to 15 minutes
π°οΈ Estimating Time
π€ΈββοΈ Activity (new tab): 7 to 15 minutes
π After-Activity Reading (below): 7 to 15 minutes
Lady Gaga
performing at Tops in Blue for the US Air Force 20th Fighter Wing
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You, he said, are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world. And that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain.
Psychology of Authenticity
Think about the last time you caught yourself smiling at something you didn't actually find funny, or agreeing with someone just to keep the peace, or scrolling past a version of "you" online that's a little more polished than the you who exists off-camera. None of that makes you a fraud. It makes you human. But it does raise a question worth sitting with: how much of our daily lives is actually ours? Trying to pin down what it means to be authentic isn't as easy as it may seem. Not in the vague, poster-on-a-dorm-wall sense of "just be yourself." But psychology has struggled decades for something measurable, layered, and surprisingly complicated. As we understand authenticity today, it isn't a single thing. It's knowing yourself, accepting what you find, acting on it even when it costs you something, and letting the people close to you see the real you. You can be strong in one of these areas and shaky in another. Let's walk through eight different lens psychology has focused upon authenticity, consider what the research says about why it matters, and hopefully conclude with a clearer, kinder mirror we have to see our true selves within.
Table 1: Interpreting Scores on Authenticity Facets
Eight Facets of Authenticity
Let's describe each of the eight facets of authenticity while using table 1 to interpret our results.
Analytical Awareness: How well do you actually know yourself: your motives, your contradictions, the "why" behind your patterns. It's about your effort. High scorers tend to go digging for the truth about themselves, even the unflattering parts, rather than settling for a comfortable story.
Unbiased Processing: Can you look at your own strengths and flaws without flinching away or dressing them up. It's less about what you know about yourself (that's analytical awareness) and more about whether you can take in information about yourself without distortion. Without excessive flattery. With excessive self-flagellation either.
Behavioral: Do your actions actually match your values, or do you catch yourself performing a more agreeable version of yourself to keep others comfortable? High scorers intentionally act from their own compass even when it costs them socially. Low scorers are agreeable, they tend to intentionally nod along to avoid friction.
Relational Orientation: An outward lens. It's less about knowing yourself. It's about needing to be known, especially by people close to you. High scorers value being truly seen (flaws included) rather than maintaining a polished image. Low scorers are not necessarily susceptible to conformity, rather they're guarded and more interested in image over intimacy.
Felt Self-Congruence: Whereas analytical awareness is actively thinking to understand ourselves, this is about feeling a sense of self. Do you feel in touch with yourself, or foggy and estranged from your own inner life?
Authentic Living of Values: Living in line with your values day to day. Whereas behavioral is about resisting social pressure of other people, this is a more general living core values.
Boundary Integrity: How much do you hold your ground when under peer pressure? Whereas behavioral is an intentional choice to allow others to steer us (e.g., pretend, pursue goals others care about), this is more about maintaining boundaries and avoiding people pleasing tendencies.
Authenticity at School/Work: This one is deliberately narrow, rather about who you are in general. It's about whether you can be your real self in a specific context you find yourself in (school or work). Low scorers are susceptible to emotional exhaustion and burnout.
Analytical Awareness: How well do you actually know yourself: your motives, your contradictions, the "why" behind your patterns. It's about your effort. High scorers tend to go digging for the truth about themselves, even the unflattering parts, rather than settling for a comfortable story.
Unbiased Processing: Can you look at your own strengths and flaws without flinching away or dressing them up. It's less about what you know about yourself (that's analytical awareness) and more about whether you can take in information about yourself without distortion. Without excessive flattery. With excessive self-flagellation either.
Behavioral: Do your actions actually match your values, or do you catch yourself performing a more agreeable version of yourself to keep others comfortable? High scorers intentionally act from their own compass even when it costs them socially. Low scorers are agreeable, they tend to intentionally nod along to avoid friction.
Relational Orientation: An outward lens. It's less about knowing yourself. It's about needing to be known, especially by people close to you. High scorers value being truly seen (flaws included) rather than maintaining a polished image. Low scorers are not necessarily susceptible to conformity, rather they're guarded and more interested in image over intimacy.
Felt Self-Congruence: Whereas analytical awareness is actively thinking to understand ourselves, this is about feeling a sense of self. Do you feel in touch with yourself, or foggy and estranged from your own inner life?
Authentic Living of Values: Living in line with your values day to day. Whereas behavioral is about resisting social pressure of other people, this is a more general living core values.
Boundary Integrity: How much do you hold your ground when under peer pressure? Whereas behavioral is an intentional choice to allow others to steer us (e.g., pretend, pursue goals others care about), this is more about maintaining boundaries and avoiding people pleasing tendencies.
Authenticity at School/Work: This one is deliberately narrow, rather about who you are in general. It's about whether you can be your real self in a specific context you find yourself in (school or work). Low scorers are susceptible to emotional exhaustion and burnout.
Interpreting the Patterns within Our Results
Are your ratings all similarly high, middle, or low? If so, your interpretation may be more straightforward. But if you're like me, you might have very different numbers. Notice which are especially high and especially low. I'm quite high in four facets, and quite low in the other four facets. Though these facets were studied by different psychology researchers with different theoretical approaches, some facets share overlapping elements of authenticity. Maybe you score high, or low, on scales within the same cluster?
Values-in-Action: Do your values, thoughts, and feelings align with how you actually show up in the world? (Behavioral, Authentic Living of Values, Boundary Integrity, and Authenticity at School/Work)
Honesty: How much does honesty drive your self-exploration, self-evaluation, desire for connection with others? (Analytical Awareness, Unbiased Processing, Relational Orientation)
Self-Knowledge: To what extent do you know yourself, both intuitively and through deliberate effort (Analytical Awareness, Felt Self-Congruence)
Personally, my cluster scores are mixed except I'm high in all three facets of honesty. As I reflect about my pursuit of authenticity, I can see how much honesty means to me.
Consider your contrasting ratings, especially within clusters. Reread the facet descriptions and consider what. For example, I'm a bundle of contradictions. Self-Knowledge: I'm high in analytical awareness but low in felt self-congruence so I'm really good at thinking about who I am, but terrible at just knowing her. Values-in-Action: I'm quite high in authentic living but low in everything else, so I'm focused on my values, but readily become agreeable about everything else.
Do any of your results feel opposite for you even if they're not in the clusters. I found it striking I'm so high in relational orientation and so low in boundary integrity. Both, to me, are about relationships.1 But upon reflection, it's not so contradictory afterall. I deeply value being known and truly knowing others (high RO), but with so much vulnerability and attunement, I just feel a need to please others no matter how much I bend.
So, in short, this activity wraps in a nice little bow all the reasons I'm in therapy! π€£ (See, high honesty cluster.)
Values-in-Action: Do your values, thoughts, and feelings align with how you actually show up in the world? (Behavioral, Authentic Living of Values, Boundary Integrity, and Authenticity at School/Work)
Honesty: How much does honesty drive your self-exploration, self-evaluation, desire for connection with others? (Analytical Awareness, Unbiased Processing, Relational Orientation)
Self-Knowledge: To what extent do you know yourself, both intuitively and through deliberate effort (Analytical Awareness, Felt Self-Congruence)
Personally, my cluster scores are mixed except I'm high in all three facets of honesty. As I reflect about my pursuit of authenticity, I can see how much honesty means to me.
Consider your contrasting ratings, especially within clusters. Reread the facet descriptions and consider what. For example, I'm a bundle of contradictions. Self-Knowledge: I'm high in analytical awareness but low in felt self-congruence so I'm really good at thinking about who I am, but terrible at just knowing her. Values-in-Action: I'm quite high in authentic living but low in everything else, so I'm focused on my values, but readily become agreeable about everything else.
Do any of your results feel opposite for you even if they're not in the clusters. I found it striking I'm so high in relational orientation and so low in boundary integrity. Both, to me, are about relationships.1 But upon reflection, it's not so contradictory afterall. I deeply value being known and truly knowing others (high RO), but with so much vulnerability and attunement, I just feel a need to please others no matter how much I bend.
So, in short, this activity wraps in a nice little bow all the reasons I'm in therapy! π€£ (See, high honesty cluster.)
Authenticity and Happiness
People who live in line with their true selves tend to be happier and carry less psychological distress (Boyraz et al., 2014; Kifer et al., 2013), and when life gets hard, they reach for healthier coping strategies instead of avoidant ones like substance use (Kernis & Goldman, 2000). Part is mindfulness. People who are more attuned with their present-moment thoughts and feelings tend to also be more authentic (Lakey et al., 2008), which makes sense: it's hard to be true to a self you're not actually paying attention to. Self-compassionate people tend to be more authentic too (Chew & Ang, 2023), and people who feel like their choices come from them - not from obligation or outside pressure - report a stronger, steadier sense of well-being. Even people facing something as frightening as a cancer diagnosis show less fear of death when they have a strong sense of their authentic self (Nazari et al., 2023), as if knowing yourself well enough softens some of the terror of losing that self. Similarly, people who ruminate anxiously about death tend to feel less authentic, but people who vividly recall one specific brush with mortality often feel more authentic afterward (Seto et al., 2016). Afterall, clear-eyed encouters with our own mortality can sharpen our sense of what truly matters.
Authenticity and Relationships
Authenticity also shapes how we show up for other people. Choosing to be vulnerable, letting someone see our imperfections instead of a polished version of ourself is scary. But it's also how people build genuinely deep relationships (Lopez & Rice, 2006). Authentic people tend to have more secure attachment styles (HuΕ£anu & Holman, 2026). They're also less likely to feel lonely, even in a room full of people, because surface-level contact doesn't do much for us if it doesn't feel real. Meanwhile, people who constantly scan a room and shape-shift to manage what others think of them, the socially strategic, Machiavellian type, tend to score lower in authenticity (Kohler et al., 2022), which tells us authenticity isn't just the opposite of hiding, it's also the opposite of manipulating. Authentic people tend to respond to unfair treatment with less aggression (Pinto et al., 2012), and their humor skews less at other people's expense (Barnett & Deutsch, 2016). So instead of making people blunt or combative, authenticity actually softens people's sharper edges.
Authenticity and a Stigmatizing World
Authenticity doesn't develop in a vacuum, and it's worth noticing authenticity is a harder struggle when the world around you isn't built for you. People who fear rejection tend to hide more of themselves (Lopez & Ric, 2006). Unsurprisingly people navigating unsupportive and stigmatizing environments, such as persons of color and Muslim women in hostile contexts (Weinstein et al., 2017), and LGBTQ+ individuals in unaccepting ones (Legate et al., 2017; Clements & Rostosky, 2025), often can't safely show up as their full selves. Not because something is wrong with them, but because the world around them makes realness costly. Autistic adults who mask more - suppressing natural traits to fit neurotypical expectations - report feeling less authentic too (Evans et al., 2024). A Reminder authenticity depends upon how safe the world feels, not simply individual effort.
Final Thoughts
If there's one thing worth carrying away, it's that authenticity isn't a personality trait you either have or don't. It's a set of skills, habits, and conditions that show up differently across different parts of our lives. You might know yourself deeply but still feel disconnected from that knowledge. You might hold your ground on your core values while still being a pushover about where you eat lunch. You might long to be truly seen by the people you love, and still find yourself easily swayed by what they think. None of that is a contradiction. Statistically, all the facets are related. But you're not a statistic. You have an actual lived experience across layered contexts. And the research makes a compelling case for why any of this is worth noticing: people who live closer to their true selves tend to be happier, cope better with hard things, build deeper relationships, and even seem to carry less fear when facing life's hardest moments. Please take your results, not as a verdict, but as a starting point. Where do you feel solid? Where do you feel like you're performing rather than living? Authenticity isn't just a nice philosophical idea. It's protective. Wherever you are today, I hope helped you reflect about when performing instead of living, and make intentional choices when you or a persona shows up.
Additional Information
Uneasy Feelings about Your Results?
Please remember your results with any activity are not who you are. Your results are a 'snapshot' of a moment when you did an activity. It's just one measure, a single thread, of the many strands of who you are. Any result is a guess with statistical error. And it's possible the measure is flawed in a way so it doesn't work for you. Please do not think of your results as definitive dogma. Instead they're a starting point for our self reflection. Please keep in mind too, self-reflection can feel uncomfortable. "Bad" feelings are not actually bad. They're information. So, even if your activity result is inaccurate and flawed, you might ask yourself what your feeling is trying to tell you? Trusted teachers, friends, and therapists can be helpful. I wrote an essay elaborating with concrete examples how we can appreciate uneasy feelings about our activity results.
Scholarly Information?
You're welcome to use Copernican Revolution activities and essays for your thesis and studies. Having information about scholarly aspects like psychometric data, activity design details, and norm calculations may help. The primary focus of my essays is connecting educated laypersons with psychology. To help people like you, with advanced academic interests, I add an appendix with each activity.
Please remember your results with any activity are not who you are. Your results are a 'snapshot' of a moment when you did an activity. It's just one measure, a single thread, of the many strands of who you are. Any result is a guess with statistical error. And it's possible the measure is flawed in a way so it doesn't work for you. Please do not think of your results as definitive dogma. Instead they're a starting point for our self reflection. Please keep in mind too, self-reflection can feel uncomfortable. "Bad" feelings are not actually bad. They're information. So, even if your activity result is inaccurate and flawed, you might ask yourself what your feeling is trying to tell you? Trusted teachers, friends, and therapists can be helpful. I wrote an essay elaborating with concrete examples how we can appreciate uneasy feelings about our activity results.
Scholarly Information?
You're welcome to use Copernican Revolution activities and essays for your thesis and studies. Having information about scholarly aspects like psychometric data, activity design details, and norm calculations may help. The primary focus of my essays is connecting educated laypersons with psychology. To help people like you, with advanced academic interests, I add an appendix with each activity.
Footnotes & References
Note
1. Relationship is not a cluster because reviewing the actual items on the boundary integrity scale shows none of the items explicitly mention relationships, but rather focus on other people in general
Works Cited
Barnett, M. D., & Deutsch, J. T. (2016). Humanism, authenticity, and humor: Being, being real, and being funny. Personality and Individual Differences, 91, 107β112.
Boyraz, G., Waits, J. B., & Felix, V. A. (2014). Authenticity, life satisfaction, and distress: A tripartite approach. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 61(3), 498β505.
Chew, L.-C., & Ang, C.-S. (2023). The relationship among quiet ego, authenticity, self-compassion and life satisfaction in adults. Current Psychology, 42(7), 5254β5264.
Erikson, R. J., & Ritter, C. (2001). Emotional labor, burnout, and inauthenticity: Does gender matter? Social Psychology Quarterly, 64(2), 146β163.
Evans, J. A., Krumrei-Mancuso, E. J., & Rouse, S. V. (2024). What you are hiding could be hurting you: Autistic masking in relation to mental health, interpersonal trauma, authenticity, and self-esteem. Autism in Adulthood, 6(2), 229β240.
HuΕ£anu, T.-E., & Holman, A. C. (2026). Insecure, detached, and unfaithful: Propensity towards infidelity as predicted by authenticity, emotional intimacy and insecure attachment styles. Personality and Individual Differences, 257, 1β4.
Kernis, M. H., & Goldman, B. M. (2005). Authenticity, social motivation, and psychological adjustment. In J.P. Forgas, K.D. Williams, S.M. Laham, (Eds) Motivation: Conscious and Unconscious Processes. Cambridge University Press
Kernis, M. H., & Goldman, B. M. (2006). A multicomponent conceptualization of authenticity: Theory and research. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 38, 283β357.
Kohler, J., Elpers, K., & Pillow, D. R. (2022). Understanding the relations between self-monitoring and authenticity: What are the roles of theory of mind and Machiavellianism? Personality and Individual Differences, 198, 1β6.
Kifer, Y., Heller, D., Perunovic, W. Q. E., & Galinsky, A. D. (2013). The good life of the powerful: The experience of power and authenticity enhances subjective well-being. Psychological Science, 24(3), 280β288.
Lakey, C. E., Kernis, M. H., Heppner, W. L., & Lambert, N. M. (2008). Individual differences in authenticity and mindfulness as predictors of verbal defensiveness. Journal of Research in Personality, 42(1), 230β238.
Legate, N., Ryan, R. M., & Weinstein, N. (2017). Is coming out always a "good thing"? Exploring the relations of autonomy support, outness, and wellness for lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 3(2), 145-152.
Lopez, F. G., & Rice, K. G. (2006). Preliminary development and validation of a measure of relationship authenticity. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 53(3), 362β371.
Nazari, F., Khoshnood, Z., & Shahrbabaki, P. M. (2023). The relationship between authenticity and death anxiety in cancer patients. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 86(3), 966β979.
Pinto, D. G., Maltby, J., Wood, A. M., & Day, L. (2012). A behavioral test of Horney's linkage between authenticity and aggression: People living authentically are less-likely to respond aggressively in unfair situations. Personality and Individual Differences, 52(1), 41β44.
Seto, E., Hicks, J. A., Vess, M., & Geraci, L. (2016). The association between vivid thoughts of death and authenticity. Motivation and Emotion, 40(4), 520β540.
Weinstein, N., Ryan, W. S., DeHaan, C. R., Przybylski, A. K., Legate, N., & Ryan, R. M. (2017). Parental autonomy support and discrimination in a stigmatized minority. Stigma and
Health, 4(4), 367-376
Wood, A. M., Linley, P. A., Maltby, J., Baliousis, M., & Joseph, S. (2008). The authentic personality: A theoretical and empirical conceptualization and the development of the Authenticity Scale. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 55(3), 385β399.
1. Relationship is not a cluster because reviewing the actual items on the boundary integrity scale shows none of the items explicitly mention relationships, but rather focus on other people in general
Works Cited
Barnett, M. D., & Deutsch, J. T. (2016). Humanism, authenticity, and humor: Being, being real, and being funny. Personality and Individual Differences, 91, 107β112.
Boyraz, G., Waits, J. B., & Felix, V. A. (2014). Authenticity, life satisfaction, and distress: A tripartite approach. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 61(3), 498β505.
Chew, L.-C., & Ang, C.-S. (2023). The relationship among quiet ego, authenticity, self-compassion and life satisfaction in adults. Current Psychology, 42(7), 5254β5264.
Erikson, R. J., & Ritter, C. (2001). Emotional labor, burnout, and inauthenticity: Does gender matter? Social Psychology Quarterly, 64(2), 146β163.
Evans, J. A., Krumrei-Mancuso, E. J., & Rouse, S. V. (2024). What you are hiding could be hurting you: Autistic masking in relation to mental health, interpersonal trauma, authenticity, and self-esteem. Autism in Adulthood, 6(2), 229β240.
HuΕ£anu, T.-E., & Holman, A. C. (2026). Insecure, detached, and unfaithful: Propensity towards infidelity as predicted by authenticity, emotional intimacy and insecure attachment styles. Personality and Individual Differences, 257, 1β4.
Kernis, M. H., & Goldman, B. M. (2005). Authenticity, social motivation, and psychological adjustment. In J.P. Forgas, K.D. Williams, S.M. Laham, (Eds) Motivation: Conscious and Unconscious Processes. Cambridge University Press
Kernis, M. H., & Goldman, B. M. (2006). A multicomponent conceptualization of authenticity: Theory and research. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 38, 283β357.
Kohler, J., Elpers, K., & Pillow, D. R. (2022). Understanding the relations between self-monitoring and authenticity: What are the roles of theory of mind and Machiavellianism? Personality and Individual Differences, 198, 1β6.
Kifer, Y., Heller, D., Perunovic, W. Q. E., & Galinsky, A. D. (2013). The good life of the powerful: The experience of power and authenticity enhances subjective well-being. Psychological Science, 24(3), 280β288.
Lakey, C. E., Kernis, M. H., Heppner, W. L., & Lambert, N. M. (2008). Individual differences in authenticity and mindfulness as predictors of verbal defensiveness. Journal of Research in Personality, 42(1), 230β238.
Legate, N., Ryan, R. M., & Weinstein, N. (2017). Is coming out always a "good thing"? Exploring the relations of autonomy support, outness, and wellness for lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 3(2), 145-152.
Lopez, F. G., & Rice, K. G. (2006). Preliminary development and validation of a measure of relationship authenticity. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 53(3), 362β371.
Nazari, F., Khoshnood, Z., & Shahrbabaki, P. M. (2023). The relationship between authenticity and death anxiety in cancer patients. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 86(3), 966β979.
Pinto, D. G., Maltby, J., Wood, A. M., & Day, L. (2012). A behavioral test of Horney's linkage between authenticity and aggression: People living authentically are less-likely to respond aggressively in unfair situations. Personality and Individual Differences, 52(1), 41β44.
Seto, E., Hicks, J. A., Vess, M., & Geraci, L. (2016). The association between vivid thoughts of death and authenticity. Motivation and Emotion, 40(4), 520β540.
Weinstein, N., Ryan, W. S., DeHaan, C. R., Przybylski, A. K., Legate, N., & Ryan, R. M. (2017). Parental autonomy support and discrimination in a stigmatized minority. Stigma and
Health, 4(4), 367-376
Wood, A. M., Linley, P. A., Maltby, J., Baliousis, M., & Joseph, S. (2008). The authentic personality: A theoretical and empirical conceptualization and the development of the Authenticity Scale. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 55(3), 385β399.
Citation
Grobman, K. H. (2026). How Do We Know When We're Being Ourselves? The Psychology of Authenticity, CopernicanRevolution.org
Citation date reflects activity creation; essays are continually improved.
Grobman, K. H. (2026). How Do We Know When We're Being Ourselves? The Psychology of Authenticity, CopernicanRevolution.org
Citation date reflects activity creation; essays are continually improved.
